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"Something, Something, Cock" will be what they write on my tombstone.
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Wife

Chapter: Season Eight
Characters: Brett, Charlie, Trevor
  1. Brian
    April 19, 2017, 12:41 pm | #

    HOVER-TEXT: “Something, Something, Cock” will be what they write on my tombstone.

    • Liack
      April 19, 2017, 1:13 pm | #

      “Something, something, dark side” comes to mind 😛

    • ff6shadow
      April 20, 2017, 1:56 pm | #

      “Something, Something, Cock” sounds like the title to a bad Star Wars porn. Also, hilarious

    • Craig
      April 22, 2017, 6:29 pm | #

      Funny, sounds like a swinger party game modeled after duck-duck-goose, to me.

  2. Racer X
    April 19, 2017, 12:56 pm | #

    Man who would have thought he would go from the tables that guy to Christmas lord with a badass wife in just a few short years.

    • Xero
      April 19, 2017, 1:04 pm | #

      Who would have thought hed go from “no chicks at the table” to first one married

      • Sweeper
        April 19, 2017, 1:08 pm | #

        If nothing else, Brett is proof that even stubborn people can be taught. 😀

        • mepstein73
          April 19, 2017, 1:15 pm | #

          Hear hear! And congratulations to Brett and Jeanie.

          • Kittikin
            April 19, 2017, 11:04 pm | #

            Yes!!! I’m so proud of brett! what’s interesting is how similar he and dove used to be. Both were arrogant and misogynistic. Brett has come a long damn way and I’m so happy for him and Jeanie mazeltov to them!

            • Tsapki
              April 20, 2017, 7:16 pm | #

              Hmm, I’m not so sure if Brent was misogynistic as just superstitious, but may memory may not be bringing up certain events. In either case, his growth is still admirable.

  3. Juan Gonzalez
    April 19, 2017, 1:35 pm | #

    When they married?

    • Matt Jackson
      April 19, 2017, 2:27 pm | #

      There wasn’t an “on-screen” wedding, but this is the first comic that hinted. (They’re wearing rings!) https://d20monkey.com/comic/meanwhile-at-the-north-pole/

      • Christopher
        April 20, 2017, 9:35 am | #

        And the hover text pointing out they were wearing rings.
        And Jeanie actually being at the northpole at that time Wich in general is reserved for the Wife and Helpers of Santa.

  4. Jonathan Felber
    April 19, 2017, 2:10 pm | #

    I think I need a Christmas Valkyrie for the top of my tree this year

  5. moekosowl
    April 19, 2017, 3:05 pm | #

    “Christmas Valkyrie” Is the name of my Trans Siberian Orchestra tribute band.

  6. Felipe Soares
    April 19, 2017, 3:30 pm | #

    Appropriate John Mulaney bit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhbaAFl3rXg

  7. Threadmiser
    April 19, 2017, 6:58 pm | #

    Can confirm: the first year or so of marriage is spent trying to work “my wife” into conversations just to hear it yourself. It doesn’t feel real for a bit.

    • Trent
      April 20, 2017, 12:26 am | #

      So do the first months or years depending on time frame of saying Fiance/Fiancee.

      • Threadmiser
        April 20, 2017, 6:11 pm | #

        My wife and I were only engaged for 3 months, and dated for just 3 months prior. We were still getting used to “boyfriend/girlfriend” when we got married.

  8. Ashonai
    April 19, 2017, 8:29 pm | #

    EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
    *all the glass everywhere shatters*

  9. AbbeFaria
    April 19, 2017, 9:25 pm | #

    Saying “Christmas Valkyrie” is probably also near the top of the list.

  10. Apep
    April 19, 2017, 10:09 pm | #

    Let’s be real here – if Brett did interfere, it’d only be to keep Jeanie from literally murdering Dove.

    • Robin Bobcat
      April 19, 2017, 10:50 pm | #

      “No honey! There are witnesses!”

  11. Melody
    April 19, 2017, 11:42 pm | #

    Yay Brett is back too!!

  12. Trent
    April 20, 2017, 12:26 am | #

    I think this is the first time I have seen Trevor say ‘Man’ instead of ‘Girl’ to someone.

  13. porthos9438
    April 20, 2017, 1:11 am | #

    I gotta say, I am REALLY loving this portrayal of Brett. In the beginning he looked unhealthy overweight (kinda like me…sigh) But here he just looks powerful. He carries it well.

  14. Sita
    April 20, 2017, 4:36 am | #

    YAY Christmas Valkyrie! What a wonderful job-title! And she lives up to it. Brett is right to be proud of her.

    • Christopher
      April 20, 2017, 9:37 am | #

      Some people jsut fit the job.
      Jeanie fit so well, she MADE the job.

  15. Dominic
    April 20, 2017, 6:56 am | #

    There is still something magical about that phrase. “My wife”. Yes, my wife is the one who is picking apart the costuming on this 16th-century Turkish historical drama for having obvious zippers. Soon?

    “My kid”. Yes, my kid is the one telling the teacher that “you need to know this for the exam” isn’t an excuse to teach bad history.

  16. TB
    April 20, 2017, 11:46 am | #

    Thus the dreaded “Mrs. Clause” fine print is neatly avoided.

    And take it from me, saying “my wife” doesn’t get any less cool after forty years.

  17. Deragon Rider
    April 20, 2017, 12:39 pm | #

    Dammit I feel a bit of miss opportunity, i would love to see the hoops and red tape for Brett to have tied the knot with Jeanie AND getting all of his mortal friends to the North Pole for the Wedding.

  18. Cody Connelly
    April 20, 2017, 11:49 pm | #

    I honestly love Brett’s character development. He has really grown over the years. Plus, Brett’s joy at Jeanie’s bad-assery is just one of the most adorable things ever.

  19. Celtedge
    April 21, 2017, 12:44 am | #

    Loving the love

  20. Sweeper
    April 21, 2017, 5:16 am | #

    Wonder if Carlos, who just landed a sweet, if challenging, job is off-camera.

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