The Fanciest Orc on the Unemployment Line
Chapter: Comics, Season Five
“Crapping like a fancy Lord” is what I am going to yell in the stalls during GenCon every year, forever. Also, I can hear all of the GMs writing this down to use as a cursed item. You’re totally welcome.
The Exploding Rogue team appeared on a few things this week to talk about Karthun, the Kickstarter, and a few things we have coming up from our new joint venture. If you’re into podcasts and such, check these out!
Haste! The Obsidian Portal Podcast.
I think I need to work out a way to get my party to pick up a dookie filled BoH then trick them into turning it inside out. To the drawing board!
Think of it like a bag of devouring.
First time in: totally normal.
Next time in: horrible surprise.
As to the turning inside out, thats a bit trickier, maybe find some reason they need to fertalize crops or poison a water supply.
I think he meant “trick them into turning it inside out without them knowing it’s full of orc crap”
oh god…. you sir are truly evil….I applaud you
Nonono… you do what I did: One Bag, one load of… fertilizer… and one Fireball spell with a trigger.
“What’s in this shiny magical bag?” *BLORF*
(full disclosure, my original version used a bagload of hot oatmeal, but this works too)
I don’t know….. I still like the magic item I made where it doesn’t apparently change you to everyone else but to yourself you turned into the opposite sex…. So say you are a guy and you put the item on to everyone else you still look like a guy but to yourself you turned into a woman…..
he heh.. it gets on my list next to
the Belt Of Gender Changing
the Bag of Kenderspawning
the Target-Armour
and Cursed Restoration Ring ^^
Bag of Kenderspawning sounds like a campaign wrecker.
Actually, it’s worse than you think. It curses the owner so that their offspring are born as Kender…
Did you ever know that you’re my heeeeeeeeeeeroooooooooooo?
And everything I would like to beeeeeeeeee?
There was a belt of gender changing in Order of the Stick. It was actually used beneficially. But only when combined with some fake hair.
Ha, yeah! “If the magic item doesn’t specifically SAY it grows hair, it probably doesn’t.“
heh heh, that face.
Imply there is a powerful item in the bag but give no discription or name to it but plant the idea that up ending the bag might yeald results
Add dagfer of the onery wurm to the list a magic dagger thatholds the spirit of a teenage dragon and it can move independantly… but the wurm is a smart ass with a mouth
like i said teenager
My other items I like using is The Sword of Tri Horn (which coincidentally don’t radiate magic), The Ring of Acid(it’s a real trip man) and the dreaded Zimmer…. Drove people nuts when I had to make them think…..
It’s been a very long day because I laughed at this for longer than I should’ve.
So this is what an Otyugh mother packs for lunch, isn’t it?
“The Fanciest Orc on the Unemployment Line”?
He should *live* so long to bemoan such a fate…
I…I have no choice. I MUST include a bag of holding full of orc crap in my next treasure pile. Thanks for this!
Next we’ll see an orc wearing a robe, emptying that bag into the street, shouting for the world to hear: “Shitter was full!”
Hoover Text 😀
well he was right, no one was prepared for what he kept in his bag of holding not even himself.
My favorite use for a bag of holding was as a thief trap. Bag was empty, except for half a dozen armed bear traps. Good times.
Oddly enough I had a barbarian executed in a town once for using the mayor’s bag of holding as a port a potty. It was a rather um, twisted situation in either case as you can guess.
Can you imagine this situation if he had used the bag of scolding?
You know, ‘Enchantment Applies Only To Feces’ would be be one amusing limitation for a Bag of Holding.
… actually, it’d be amusing for just about any magic item…
I am a bad person.