One Night in Xag: Part Fifteen
Chapter: Season Six
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I think this says everything it needs to say but CAPTION THIS IN THE COMMENTS!
Comments are closed.
“I lose more arms and eyes this way…”
“Oh Damnit, I just put on a fresh pair of underwear 3 days ago!”
“Great, first the giant, turtles with swords and now a rat that knows kung fu … “
“Dammit, I zigged when I should have Xag’d”
“Don’t ever suggest a vegan pizza to a rat.”
“Ch-ch-ch-Chip and Dale!”
God dammit, I was also about to make a Rescue Rangers joke. God bless ya.
Glad I’m not the only one whose mind went there first.
“CROIKEY! LOOKIT THE CLAWS ON DIS ONE!”
Ahm gonna poke it with this big, metal-studded stick!
Speaking as someone who comes from Australia, I can say with no hesitation that that was the best possible response.
“A spider! I’ll get it for you!”
1D6 + 2 damage when you only have 8 hitpoints.
“I’m guessing a breathmint’s outta the question?”
CHEEEEEEESSSSSEEEEE!!!!!!
Seriously. Ravenous, eat a snickers.
Feel Better?
*Remy from Ratatouille takes place of wererat* Better.
Is it bad that i am rooting for the rat cause of how awesome drawn he is?
“QUICK! A WITTY COMMENT!”
On another note: How do you handle Hit Points in D&D? Is every lost HP a scratch, fleshwound, or cut, or do you have a more omnious way of how lost HP and Cure Wounds work?
Depends on the campaign – if combat is sparse, then there is time and resources to both get very descriptive and to keep track of the types of wounds etc. The first iterations of both Witch Hunter and the WotC Star Wars both lent themselves to a more cinematic play style.
If it is DnD though, more times than naught, the combats take so much time that things would bog down even further.
Personally, I’ve adopted the wounds/vitality split seen in WotC Star Wars and Spycraft. You have two pools of hit points: wounds and vitality. You have a number of wounds equal to either your Con score or your first level hit points, depending on how you want to go. All your other hit points are vitality.
Damage that comes off your vitality is just bruises, scratches, fatigue, etc. The kind of stuff that wears you down, but you also get over pretty quickly. Once you run out of vitality, you start taking wounds. These are real injuries with serious consequences that take a lot of time to get over. Under this system, critical hits also bypass vitality and do damage directly to wounds. Once you run out of wounds (even if you still have vitality left), you go unconscious.
“NOBODY PUTS FIEVEL IN A CORNER!”
“YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME!!!
…
You do? Oh. Okay.”
“Oh God No! My Bracer stored Ketchup Packets! You Monster!”
Rodents Of Unusual Size? Frankly, I don’t think they exist.
*whomp*
Mom always did like you best!
No hugs, respect my personal space!
*in best Charlie Brown voice*
RATS!
Xag-nabit!
The part of the Ravenous was played by none other than Slash!
I did not steal you squeaky toy!
“I’ll be making rat stew wit yer sorry carcass!”
“It was only a matter of time before Master Splinter snapped…
You made me bleed… my… own… blood…
Max damage you say? Tis but a scratch!
Ravenous isn’t transmitted like zombie-ism is on iZombie is it? If so I’m so screwed.
Where is a Pied Pipper when you need one?
In the Ravenous’ piping hot pie?
Why are you leaking late 90’s Wonder Man?
To obscure?
hahahaha! I’m with you.
I always liked Wonder Man.
“Get ready to meet Splinter…IN HELL!”
Rodents Of Unusual Size? I don’t believe they exist.
My caption –
https://twitter.com/Mattwilljackson/status/692382308754669569
Okay, that was the awesomest caption!
“♫ Gimme that night fever, night fever, we know how to show it ♪”
Disarm attempt: Partial success.
Master Splinter, stop shredding the guests!
– Here’s Johnny!
– I don’t need a shield I said. I’ll be fine I said. What the hell was I thinking?
– Hello Lunch!
“Okay, OKAY, you can come in and talk about your stupid savior! Geez!”
“That red slime is attacking you! I’ll protect you, my friend!”
Hmm. so does lycanthrpy spread through bites or all wounds in this setting?
Calvis later recalled events as such: “At first Burg was excited to finally meet a fellow cheese enthusiast in Xag, but then they got into a debate on whether or not Gorgonzola is a better blue cheese than Roquefort and… well, let’s just say things got REALLY ugly, REALLY fast.”
“Always use protection to avoid infection” when engaging in wererat play.
“I’ll block his claw attack by punching it!”
“Tag, you’re it!”
“Xag, you’re it!”
bringing claws to a club fight.
Bring it Mickey!
Since we’re talking Snickers taglines: “Hungry? Why wait?”
“Magazine subscription salesmen have gotten increasingly pushy”
Aw, damn it. I’m all caught up. It’s been a sweet couple of days, just discovered D20Monkey.
“Can our heroes survive the fight, or will the ravenous claim victory. Find out in the next exciting episode of D20 Monkey!”
or alternatively
“DODGE!”
’tis but a scratch’
Your best attack and it’s still in vein.
Alternatively:
I don’t usually fight rats, I’m more of an Orkin’ man; but I think it’s time to make an exception.
“He looks better in red.”
Not jumping in with a caption, only to say that this is a phenomenal piece and probably deserves to be a wallpaper or something.
“F-f-f-***! I just washed that arm last year you a*****e! I HATE taking baths!”
😉
Love the angry expression on Burg’s face. It really hammers home how he responds to combat and injury, implying that he’s more of a “no fear in the face of physical threat” kind of person; getting wounded just irritates him.
By any chance is he a berserker?
Also, are those runed (is that a word?) bracelets/bracers on that Ravenous?